Thursday, 25 September 2008

  • What’s a little loose skin, right?

    When I originally heard of banding and what the surgery I was having would offer me down the road, and what rewards I would gain (a thinner body, skinny even), I was excited for sure. Now, almost four years down the banded path, my mind is definitely not in the same spot. I think it’s impossible to be skinny, or even thin. I mean, my bones just won’t allow for that. I am a big girl – I always will be a big girl. I am just not as big as what I used to be.

    I’m not fat, I’m just big boned.

    I’ve never heard that before <<sarcasm at its’ best>>

    tireAnyway, so I’ve lost a crazy amount of weight over the past four years, and even a bit more since January. The thing that gets me now isn’t the fact that I am big boned, or that I have xx amount of weight to lose. It’s the skin that once held the fat that I am so self conscious about. I went away for a work conference last week, and they took a group picture. Sure, my eyes are closed in the picture, but all I can see is the tire around my belly. It’s all skin. It just sits there.

    Please – for all of those who are reading who are banded or not – know that I do not regret the surgery and what rewards it has given me. Being banded has given me new life. It has allowed me to shop at regular stores, and feel ‘normal.’ It’s just… the loose skin covers my body. It’s on my legs, and my boobs, my stomach and below my belly button. It’s everywhere except my face. And maybe it’s there, too.

    Should I have exercised a lot earlier than what I did?

    I am not big on regrets. I never have been. The choices I have made in my life – well – I’ve made them for a reason. I didn’t exercise because I was lazy. There’s no way around it. Just plain lazy. Then I had my ass kicked in December, so January it was time to get it in gear. Insert the exercise, the hiking, the 2 5km races, and tada – here comes more weightloss. Not that I am complaining because I really am not. People notice all the time (which I love!).

    It’s just this loose skin that makes me feel like a Sharpei sometimes… 

     

About this Entry

Who recommended?